But when a relationship ends due to outside sources such as religion, family, or culture its different. You still have love for that person even though you can't marry them due to too many outside conflicts. Its frustrating, disappointing, but I actually find it easier to deal with. I have had two relationships end this way, and one like the former. I am still friends with these two men because we did not end our relationship due to internal issues, more to external issues. The first it was because we were too young, 16 at the time, and I could not make a life long commitment at that age. We also wanted to live in different places and wanted different things for our lives. But after 10 years of knowing each other we are still friends. The second, and most current, was over religion, culture, family, and legal issues. In this case too many outside sources to balance. We were great between each other but once you started adding in what we needed for marriage the relationship did not add up. If you need to drastically change yourself to make a relationship work then the relationship will never work as well as needed. It won't be you in the relationship, it will be a fabrication of yourself. And that is not good for you, nor is it good for your partner.
Do I still love him? Of course. You never stop loving someone. But love does not a marriage make. Marriage is built on Love, Friendship, and Compatibility. Compatibility can include culture, religion, family, and the like. You do need to have a way to balance interior and exterior influences in a marriage. If you can't find a balance, most likely it is not the marriage for you.
Posts
